Emma Santiago is a very smart young woman. You can tell the minute you talk to her. She is bright, articulate, positive. Her story is a perfect example of how even the smartest of us have unique struggles and, sometimes, crushing self-doubt which often hinders us from accomplishing our dreams and goals. Emma found a path forward attending the Veterinary Technology program. With the support of her teachers, she overcame a personal challenge and is working to reach her ultimate goal; to sharpen her skills and eventually get into emergency medicine. Emma is doing it.

 

Tell me about yourself.

I was born and raised in Sacramento. My parents were born in the 1960’s; my father came from very traditional Portuguese family. I have an older brother. We learned punctuality from our Dad; also to always say, “Yes mam, Yes sir.” It was love, but a kind of tough love. I like to think I am the good parts of both my parents. A mix of their best.

What inspired you to pursue Veterinary Technology?

Growing up, we had a black lab named Buddy. He was the perfect family dog. When he got to be about 12 years old, he developed multiple cancers; he had lumps everywhere. We cared for him as long as we could. But when it was time, we called the vet. Watching the process, there was a Veterinary Technician who came in first; she explained to us what was going to happen. I learned the word euthanasia derives from two Greek words, translated means “the good death.” I never forgot that. It was very bittersweet to euthanize him, but we knew we had done as much as we could.

You have said, “this program opened my eyes and gave me a new sense of purpose.” What was that purpose exactly?

I hated school growing up; I dreaded it. Four years of high school were challenging for me to grow up and navigate who I was. My mind was always running a thousand thoughts a minute and it was hard to focus at times. I developed a mindset of this is too much, I can’t do it. But within my first week of  Veterinary Technology, Ms. Gillombardo – we called her just Ms. G, but I called her Sargent G – convinced me not to do what I did in high school and to hop on this train. And I was ready – I felt like all my teachers were so supportive! I realized they understood how hard it was for me and were always there to help me. They would never give me the answer; they would actually answer my question with a question. But then, they would always steer me in the right direction. I learned from them my purpose was to try my best.

I understand you showed a lot of promise early in the program but then you kept struggling with self-doubt; where do you think that came from?

It goes back to my Dad – he was my biggest hero but also my deepest struggle. He didn’t know how to express his love any other way than by being strict. He taught me how to talk to adults but not how to navigate through my feelings. I felt a rush to do things for them so they could see it, rather than for my own sense of accomplishment. I had a vague emotional sense of myself; I struggled with imposter syndrome.

What was it about the Veterinary Technology program that you liked?

I liked that from the second you walked in you had a scheduled plan from the teachers. There were five distinct terms: the teachers were really good about telling you how to be prepared for each one. It helped me to try my best.

There were challenges, of course; I wasn’t interested in learning about large animals, for example. I thought I only wanted to learn about small animals. But I did it anyway with their help, realizing it was ultimately good for my long-term career. I had great teachers – they made it interesting enough in my brain to get me through the parts I couldn’t focus on. I learned to respect the people who paved the way for me. These teachers are compassionate and kind. They are so smart; they have good hearts. They want you to succeed.

What was most challenging for you?

The last term I didn’t do well; but I finished anyway and only had the Veterinary Technician National Examination left to take in order to become licensed. I was scared to take the exam because I knew I hadn’t done well the last term. That’s when I shut down and went back to my old ways – instead of studying I got on my stubborn high horse. I started working 70-hour weeks; I went back and worked at a pizza place I’d worked at since I was 17, plus I worked part time at a veterinary hospital. The teachers warned me the longer I waited to take the exam the less I would remember the information. But for 6 months I worked too much and didn’t take care of myself.

What turned you around?

I watched the other students progress beyond school and saw that I was holding myself back. I knew I had the support of the teachers and the students if I would let them help me. I got tired of letting my brain control everything; it was just hard to get out of my head sometimes. Then I talked to my grandmom; she and Dad helped pay my way to school. I admitted to myself I was afraid of letting them down. So, I took a month off my pizza job and stayed home studying. It was now or never. I called the teachers and students I knew would help me; the students told me exactly what to study for. Then I emailed Ms. Farrar, the Veterinary Technology Program Director. She immediately emailed me right back! Said they were so excited for me.  I ended up passing and becoming licensed.

What’s the most important thing you learned about yourself while studying to be a Veterinary Technology?

The hardest thing for me was to overcome my own mind: it can be very hard to get my mind to focus, but if I do – I’m going to make it happen.